Not For Christmas This Year

I read about an amusing (typically American) reaction to the crazy political correctness issue that has galvanized the U.S. recently. It seems that a church group in Polk County, Florida, erected a nativity scene on public property in Bartow Florida. Officials there, attuned to being politically correct by not "offending those who do not celebrate Christmas", warned that it might open the door to other religious displays.
Boy!! Were they right. Since the nativity was erected, displays have gone up (both religious and not so religious) honoring everything from Zoroastrianism (what does a Zoroastrian Santa Claus wear?) to the fake holiday "Festivus", once featured on a TV show. Haha Santa may have an identity crises when he visits Polk County Christmas Day. The World Wide Fund for Nature has posted a list of Christmas gifts it says buyers should have ignored this Christmas. It says too many of us threaten the planet with extinction. I doubt Santa would Ho Ho Ho if you asked for any of those gifts this year.
Here are some of the things the environmentally sensitive Christmas shopper should have done without.
1) Tiger products or tigers for pets- The WWF says that "All international trade of tiger products, whether used in traditional Asian medicine, as souvenirs or for good luck charms (NO! Tiger good luck charms won't make me stay me away from your mail box), is illegal".
2) Ivory tusks- Tisk, Tisk ( or should I say "tusk, tusk"?) Find something else to put on your piano keyboard. Ivory in any form should be avoided because the ivory trade threatens the survival of elephants.
3) Caspian Sea sturgeon- Isn't that stuff already so polluted it makes the eater glow? But the Caspian Sea, the source of the famed Beluga caviar, should not be fished for caviar. Illegal plunder of Beluga caviar is making the fish nearly extinct. If you buy Beluga this holiday season it should only come in jars certified by the United Nations agency, CITES, that is fighting to keep Beluga caviar from disappearing.
4) Shahtoosh scarves- Those are those fashionable scarves woven from the hair of Tibetan antelopes, because to obtain the wool, the Tibetan antelope must first be killed. Hmmmmm A cheap lamb wool scarf is just a s comfortable an nice looking. Say "Bah" Humbug if offered a Shahtoosh this season.
5) cactus- I have seen those little cactus for sale in some stores, but the WWF says that the illegal trade in them is wiping them out, particularly the Mexican cactus populations. Don't get 'stuck" on cactus this year!
6) Energy guzzlers- Yep! The finally category to avoid is what so many consumers increasingly like these days. The WWF says we should avoid buying appliances like TV's and stereos that consume large amounts of electricity while on standby. Apparently, this is a drain on energy and therefore, a threat to the environment.
Sigh... I agree with the entire list,. But where is the cell phone ban. Those things should be banned on the basis that they endanger good manners.