The New Nursing Home

In the United States there has been an explosion in the number of elderly living centers that meet the increasingly long life span of people today. Those nursing homes, assisted living centers and a multitude of other places where the kids can stash away mom and dad when age makes it difficult for mom and dad to live alone or with the kids. It used to be that "being sent to the nursing home" was almost like a prison sentence for an oldie. But today, those homes are lavish, all because the government has made assistance to the elderly an entitlement that makes it possible. It's expensive to be live in a nursing home, but today's welfare and/or the usual large life savings of the candidates makes it possible for quite a few oldies.

I see ads for new nursing homes and assisted living communities every day. They are big money makers for the people who run them, and some oldies don't mind living there, given the amenities of those places verses trying to struggle each day maintaining a home alone. The new nursing homes have it all. They have barber shops, restaurants on campus, planned excursions for the residents, community activities, musical and theater performances at the homes  and much mire. Uh, to show you the latest example, and one which might make me sign up for a nursing home, look at this community announcement from my local newspaper as it appeared today.

DRAG QUEEN SHOW
Rose Villa Senior Living will host a drag queen show in honor of Pride Month at 7 p.m. at Rose Villa Living, Performance Arts Center, 13505 S.E. River Road. The event is free and open to the public.

I''m not kidding. The ad announcement is real. (I wonder if I can reserve a room at Rose Villa?) But is this kind of activity for the elderly over the top? I am not sure if the queens will excite the residents or overexcite them. I suspect there will be some defibrillators brought in to restart hearts as need. It sure is a novel way of attracting the new residents. I wonder if that place has porno night or an elderly resident strip show. Hmmm If they have the latter I will give up my room reservation at Rose Villa. There is nothing like a strip show by 80 year old women to make one glad that he she is mortal and the end is near.

Free enterprise is more alive at elderly homes than are the residents. I suppose it's for the better, given the image of a nursing home of the past as a place to dump relatives who are mentally or physically so deteriorated that they can't be handled by relatives at home. But I hope I never see either kind of nursing facility. Better to be independent and functioning alone that seated in front of 80 year old bare breast competitions! (I hope that last line is not a sign of my senility, but if it is, please send me to Rose Villa in time for the drag show)