Posing The Dead

Get ready for the latest in trendy. You may die laughing" when you hear about it. Yes, die is the operative word. It's a the latest in death notices and funerals out of New Orleans. In Victorian times this kind of dead body posing was not so unusual, but today are we not a more sophisticated lot?  When deceased New Orleans socialite Mickey Easterling' obituary notice showed a picture of her dead body propped in a chair with a drink and a smoke in hands as much like one of those figures one finds in a wax museum,  some people in New Orleans and elsewhere noticed. It is a bit self indulgent, if not bizarre.  How creepy would it be to go to her funeral and find her lifeless figure posing as an alive one?

Reactions about reactions to a funeral home's practice of posing cadavers has been mixed.  But them, the Egyptians went to even greater lengths to not acknowledge the end of life than that. Just look in any Egyptian tomb and you'll see even more bizarre funeral staging.  As for this one, those who attended those stage funerals say it's either a wonderful remembrance of a loved one to pose their dead body in a lifelike pose on a stage, or that it is disrespectful to the deceased and his or her family. I think I'll pass on that trend.  But this has me thinking about how various people should be posed after their death. For the average human in today's world, a cell phone should be included (at least one, but one in each hand would be a great statement of the love the deceased had for his or her "cell"). From there an individual bent could add to the pose.

New Orleanians are among the more creative people on the planet. Many years ago at the request of her will, my own aunt had a fifth of bourbon and a cartoon of cigarettes placed in her coffin. She said she wanted to make sure she had the essentials in the next life.

Here's some ideas for others who may want a more life-like funeral reception.

- Angelina Jolie might hold a foreign baby up for a photographer (also posing) because the free publicity is good for her image. Problem is, Jolie looks like she died of malnutrition years ago. I say we should also fatten her up for her funeral pose picture.
- Muslim terrorists might pose with their heads cut off. This would be almost natural look for the Islamic fundamentalist who wants to show his devotion to the cause.
- President Obama, who has some difficulty speaking truthfully, should pose with moving lips because we Americans know that whenever his lips move he lies.
- Global warmers should be packed in ice. They may not enjoy the irony, but I would love it.
- The Kardashian girls should be posed with a stupid, blank look on their faces....oh, wait....they look that way all the time in their alive state.
- I admit, I should be posed ranting about something. Why should death stop my rants?
- Vladimir Putin should pose with his shirt off. Oh, I forgot. This is too easy since he doesn't own any shirts.
- Rap music singers should be posed silently, out of respect for those who like music.
- Bill Gates should be posed with a broken computer. We will all feel better about a natural look for Bill.
- The French should all be posed pretentiously...naturally.