Valentine's Day Is For Women

Every February 14th women everywhere wait for their honey or perceived honey to make a gratuitous attempt to convince her that she is the one and only love of his life. And yes, every February 14th we men are either hiding or somehow manage to screw up our Valentine's Day obligations. I use the word obligation because Valentine's Day is a non reciprocal holiday. Women get and men give. It rarely works in reverse. this is why so many men hate VD. Too, VD never seems to bring much love to anyone, given that women expect far more largess from their lover than the men can possibly fulfill. I wonder how Valentine's Day works for lesbians and gays? I have no idea, but it has to be better than the current heterosexual arrangement.

I notice a new trend among both men and women to ignore Valentine's Day. They actually join with others for "Ant Valentine's day' parties or get together. These include singles with no lovers and married and singles who have relationships. The general idea of it is to avoid the disappointment of VD by denying it and substituting an alternative activity for it. One is to meet with a group and banter over drinks or food about some of the most hilarious or worst Valentine's days the group members have had. Here is one popular anti Valentine Day web sites to check http://www.antivday.com/forum/forum-1.html Ugh! It's a depressing place to be. Those who post there should try to find love more often and forget the bad love relationships in their past.

But by nature, anti anything isn't usually satisfying. Some of the Anti Valentine Day celebratory crowd seem a bit angry about love or their lack of it, about bad past relationships, about everything. As much as I think Valentine's Day is a one sided male massacre. I would chose to celebrate it rather than Anti Valentine's Day. God! I hope the male community doesn't know I wrote that. They might decide to start a new VD celebration by crucifying me in public on Feb. 14th. Ideally, most males would just like to forget the whole VD obligations, not celebrating it and not being anti about it.

And women? They see Valentine's Day as a day of entitlement for the female. On VD, the male is supposed to grovel and presents gifts to her, all the while being castigated for "the cheap gift" and yes...in the end...winding up sleeping on the couch.

Happy Valentine or Anti Valentine's Day! It's your choice.