There are quite a few disturbing videos on Yu Tube, everything from vulgarity to suicide has appeared . It's the allure of being seen, of having a moment of "fame", about gratifying ego and a hundred other reasons that are misguided but appealing to those with fragile egos. One of the worst, because it involves kids, and in particular, insecure ones, is the 'Am I pretty or ugly' forum. So far about 1,000 preteen and teen age (mostly girls) have posted an eerie stumbling monologue asking anyone who watches and cares to answer the 'am I pretty or ugly' question. And many do. Unfortunately, instead of ignoring the question
represent a new wave of distress rather than simple self questioning or pleas for affirmation or attention.
People who watch the videos curse and declare them "attention whores," ask for sex and to see them naked. They disparage the worth of already confused sad kids. They wonder where the parents of those who post are and call them "fugly" and worse. Fewer offer support and ask the they kids to take down their 'am I pretty or ugly'" videos and instead suggest they accept and feel good about themselves. Despite the fact that Yu Tube has a no one under age 13 policy, the majority of the children posting the 'ugly or pretty' video as at or below that age.
One wonders how could the creators of this 'am I pretty or am ugly forum' could not anticipate the nasty responses. Here is the lame justification the creator of it gives at the site.
"I am a 21 year old artist, and I made this video four months ago as a piece about the struggles a girl transitioning into womanhood must go through. It is a difficult and confusing experience, and my video aims to express some of the feelings associated with this uncertain period of life. The video acted as a social experiment as well as commentary on this disturbing trend, and has recently gained a lot of media attention, from jezebel.com to Good Morning America.
Part of the reason I made this video is because I understand where these girls are coming from on a personal level. I'm sure many commentaries on other videos, as they have with my video, say that beauty comes from within. I completely agree with this, but you hear it a lot and it can lose its meaning. What I want to say is this: no one in middle school thinks they are pretty. Even the girls that you think are perfect are also insecure. Love yourself for who you are, or a lot of time will be wasted standing in front of a mirror nit picking about something other people don't even notice. Don't hate yourself for no reason.
The sooner you start loving yourself the sooner life gets easier. Adolescence is something that every one experiences, and most people say middle school was the worst time of their life. It was for me, but it's gone uphill from there, high school was better, and college was great. Some features that I like all of the time, and some features I like only some of the time. You are beautiful and unique and if anyone says otherwise, it is because they are insecure, and making other people feel bad makes them feel better. Now get off the internet and go eat ice cream!!!!"
Much is made today of cyber bullying and pedophiles who cruise the Internet, and of low self-esteem among pre-adolescents and adolescents, especially girls, as their brains continue to develop. The videos seem to play into that. As a parent of a teen age girl I am very sensitive of young girls lives being so negatively impacted by such a forum. Negative feedback that is personal is rarely easy to hear at any age, but to tweens and teens who value as well as incorporate feedback into their own sense of worth, it can be devastating. To, the sad videos are almost a form of self mutilation or character assassination. Below is one sample of "Am I pretty or ugly?" You watch it and tell me how you would react if the child posting was your own daughter.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HwU2OcJVoIg
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