No Barking, Please

I received a spam ad I just can't resist writing about today. It's 'BARKOFF'. I think the old Hitler Nazi gang would have loved this product. The product stops dogs from barking. Yes, I know. You would rather see a product that shut me up. But even the nazi's would have trouble with that one. Let me quote the spam ad that describes Barkoff because it's too bizarre for me to do it myself.

"We all love our dogs. But there are times you just wish you could just turn off their barking. Well now you can with BARKOFF, the ingenious ultrasonic training aid that finally gives you control over your dog's barking. When you'd prefer that your dog didn't bark, simply switch on the bark off, and when your dog does bark it sets off an ultrasonic signal that is inaudible to human ears but instantly captures your dogs attention and interrupts the barking pattern to quiet him."

Training a dog to bark is like training a child not to speak. Dogs communicate with barking.  If they don't bark they become tentative, even neurotic. Why would anyone who loves a dog enough to have one want to silence the dog?  The ad says the "training" is painless, but I doubt it. If an ultrasonic blast sounds every time the dog barks it's obviously disconcerting to the dog.

I went to the web site and saw testimony from a couple of alleged BARKOFF owners who claim their dog is so much more affectionate after the dog eugenic BARKOFF training has turned their Fido into a robot.  Affectionate or shocked into stupor?  It  also claims dogs "nuisance bark" and that you can silence any noisy neighborhood dog by zapping the dog with BARKOFF. I see lawsuits coming when neighbors try that.

People have the right to speak. Dogs should have the right to bark. It's that simple. Owners who want to "silence " their pets should do so with love and attention, not piercing sound waves.  I find it disconcerting both to see such products sold and to think that many people will probably buy such things. It's  another example of the entitlement age in which we live.

 Now we are entitled to not hear dogs bark. What's next, muzzles for birds that sing in the morning? Not only is this product enough to make me bark, I would like to bite the BARKOFF CEO where it hurts most!