Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Bikini Time

It's a great month for all we men. This is the Sixty-six year anniversary of a sacred  item. The bikini made its first appearance sixty six years ago and it is still a male favorite.. This is significant because the world revolves around who looks good in a bikini,....or something like that. Thank God the bikini is a female clothing item. You might have a nightmare if I wore one, or any other man for that matter. Never was a clothing item more suited for the body beautiful types and unsuitable for the other 99% of humans. Fortunately, those who are misshapen and would look bad in a bikini usually have the sense to not wear one.

Contrary to popular belief, the bikini was not named after Bikini Atoll, the Pacific island where the U.S. military tested the atom bomb (the idea being that the swimsuit was like the atom – small, but powerful). The earliest representation of the bikini was found in an ancient Roman mosaic. The picture depicts several women in skimpy, two piece garments engaged in sporting events such as running, lifting weights and throwing the discus. I am sure Roman fat guys like me must have enjoyed looking at those hot murals. They probably drank beer and ate pizza as they gawked at the bikini ladies.

Once the bikini look arrived there was no stopping it. Even in puritan Victorian England bikinis made the scene. They became a way for women to rebel against society's rules about showing too much skin and its stigma against displaying any part of the female body. Young Victorian ladies ladies flocked to seaside resorts attired in swim wear made of wool or heavy flannel, scandalizing beach goers in costumes that left little to the imagination above the neck and below the ankle. That kind of bikini may not excited me now, but that was revealing attire for those days and leads us to the sensational bikini ancestor, the thong.

I have to give those lousy French a small credit. After the bikini disappeared they brought back and for updated the bikini. They re introduced it to the world after W.W.II  in  the form of the sexy bikinis we love today. We must have become bikini mad now because there is the bikini waxing ritual (thank Goodness kit's also only for women) and that infamous song from the early 60's, "Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini". How can anyone resent , even a bad sing when it honors the bikini?

Hmmm I think I am beginning to sound like a dirty old man, so I will stop writing about bikinis, log off and try to find some bikini ladies off line.

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