2015 Was The Year Of The Expected

It's time for a year end review. But this year I will give my stupid opinions in a more general mode. That's because 2015 seemed to me to be a quiet year for much of the world, at least on a comparative basis to recent years. Instead of specific life altering events I think we had more of the general on-going things in 2015. This is probably good, in that it shows a degree of stability not found in recent years. Perhaps the terrorist attack on Paris is the lone exception to the rule. Yet, I think that terrorist craziness have become a kind of general insanity that are now a perverted norm. We now expect it and react with less outrage become of the expectation for it.

My year end review of the "Year of the Expected" probably begins with all things related to the alleged "Peaceful religion" (yes, that would be Islam). 2015 saw a further erosion of the Muslim faith into a cult of violence, hatred, bigotry and psychosis. Few mainstream Muslims made any attempt to fight to take back their religion from the nuts. In fact, there was an almost total silence by mainstream Muslims to the terrorist sects that now define the Islamic faith. Shame on them for being silently complacent. In 2015 most non Muslims are not buying the Muslims silence as just cowardice, rather they see it as an unwillingness by mainstream Muslims to resist terrorists on even the simplest levels.

A second general thread to this past year has been the continued rise of addiction to all things electronic. I suspect the word "app" is now more popular than the word "love", but then, so many people today love their apps more than their fellow humans, it is to be expected. This is the year both the oldies and the babies were now also addicted to those crazy machines, living their lives in the virtual rather than the real.  I wonder how shallow the addicted will become in future years. When will humans tire of living their lives through apps? I suspect it won't be any time in the near future.

2015 was also the year of the end of politics. In many nations world-wide, and in particular in the United States, politics is considered such an unpleasant enterprise that voters have ignored the political world and those greasy politicians in favor of trendy, silly or empty causes like "income inequality", "police violence", "climate change" and "diversity programs".  When it's storming outside, why not create fantasy games inside? I suspect the obsession with the virtual world has made it hard for many to see the world as it actual is, not as one wants it to be. Will people continue to run from reality and toward the newest app or electronic gadget?

Another troubling trend in 2015 was the unrestricted movement of people illegally from underdeveloped lands to the riches nations, in the name of forced relocation but in reality movement by the illegals to take advantage of the wealthy nation's social welfare system. Dumping the excess of poverty on rich countries and expecting those nations to flawlessly assimilate a largely uneducated, unskilled population that often refuses to assimilate culturally is a growing world problem. Any nation that refuses the invasions is considered to be "racist". So there is little push back against the invasions. Yet it has always been clear that any nation that does not have a legal immigration system that is enforced fairly to all is doomed to itself become irrelevant. Too, this displacement is hiding the world's biggest problem- overpopulation.

Some good general trends started in 2015 as well.  The rise in charitable work is one.  Not only do affected billionaires pose as humanitarians by giving away large fortunes to massage their egos, the little ones (that would be you and me) make even bigger and sincere sacrifices now in terms of time and money contributed to charitable causes. One might be impressed enough to say that the world is a kinder and more welcoming place that it was in 2014.

More good trends include, the slow but real decline of reality TV, the trend to examine and embrace the best of traditions and "old ways" far more than in recent years, and the continued rise in income and heath status of many people in underdeveloped lands. Food shortages were less this year in the poorest countries of the world. and medical assistance in poor countries has made infant mortality and early death less of a crisis there.
Oh, but one thing remained the same. I am still here, still ranting and still annoying. Some things ever change. Happy New Year!

Water, Anyone?

Something odd has been happening across the world in many areas where high tech farming draws its water from far below the land. The water table is being depleted at alarming rates. In short, many areas where those high yield farms have been producing record crops and supply much of the world with its food, are starting to run out of water from which to irrigate their farms. It leaves a question. Is overpopulation now a real problem, not tomorrow's nightmare? Water shortages already affects every continent and around 2.8 billion people around the world at least one month out of every year. More than 1.2 billion of the world's 7 billion people already lack access to clean drinking water.
 
The severe depletion of the water table is symptomatic of a larger crisis in the United States and many other parts of the world. It's the canary in the mine that we have to address water shortages created by an over use of an out of control growth in world population.

Measurements, for example, from more than 32,000 wells in the U.S. and found water levels falling in nearly two thirds of those wells, with heavy pumping causing major declines in many areas. Much more water is being pumped from the ground than can be naturally replenished, and groundwater levels are plummeting. It's happening all over the world as less water pours from wells, some farmers are adapting by switching to different crops. Others are shutting down their drained wells and trying to scratch out a living as dry land farmers, relying only on the rains, and that isn't going to produce the huge number of crops needed to feed the out of control and growing world population.

I remember as a kid the euphoria about the "green revolution", about how modern farm techniques were ensuring that world hungry was a thing of the past. Apparently not. While politicians and media hype so called "climate change" (or is it "global warming") as a threat to "the planet", the very real problem of too many people on the earth is ignored. No politicians will tell his constituents to stop having babies. There's no chance of reelection if so. Thus, as Rome burns we fiddle. Instead of talking about certain threats, we hear spin about climate being changed by humans.

The result of this obsession with theories of how humans are changing climate is that we will soon face a real  and unspoken threat to what the leftists call "the planet's survival". The United Nations says that about 80% of the world water supply is already threatened. By the end of the century, scientists predict billions of people will be without enough water for survival. The result will be world conflict over water and food shortages that make it impossible to feed the monolithic population growth we clue lessly continue to promote. Perhaps the hysteria of "climate change' should be replaced with a campaign to control the world population from growing even more out of hand. But I doubt we will see that.

Mixed Papal Message

Call it confliction.  Pope Francis gave his annual papal speech and said all the right things on Christmas Day, but somehow the good words are a bit empty. What did his papal message say? Pope Francis spoke of  the simplicity of Jesus' birth as he rebuked what he called societies' intoxication with consumerism, pleasure, abundance and wealth. Can't argue with that. We are even more addicted to things, particularly electronic ones, than ever before in the history of the world. But is not the Catholic Church that Francis heads equally or even more addicted to "stuff".  For that matter, aren't nearly all religions practicing the same conflicted message?

In the case of Pope Francis' church, the Vatican owns the most priceless art collections in the world.  Perhaps Pope Francis could sell it and donate that money to the poor of the world.  Denouncing "consumerism" while sitting on such a priceless art collection seems hypocritical to me. Since being elected pope in 2013, Francis has tried to shape the church into one marked more by loving mercy than the old threatening and judging church of absolutes. He insists that the needs of the poor and others, including refugees and migrants, be paramount.

I hear him, but I don't see the Catholic Church doing anything more than it has done in the past. That is, donating a great deal of money and helping many, but doing far less that the papal words ask the church members to do. In the past churches set the agenda by lading with action. Now with church attendance in a free fall and donations lessening proportionally, it seems that churches are in the talking game n more than the helping one.

But perhaps I am being too critical in expecting ideals to be turned into actions. What do you think?

A Precious Christmas Discovery

I just read a poignant story in my newspaper about a man who accidentally found a more than 100 year old heart wrenching treasure. It's a story about what Christmas should be, but rarely is in this age of consumerism and selfishness. Peter Mattaliano decided to redo the fireplace in his New York City apartment and with his brother, broke open the fireplace. Out fell unearthed letters written to Santa, signed by two children named Mary and Alfred in 1905.

"I want a drum and a hook and ladder," read Alfred's letter from 1905, while a 1907 letter from Mary was stuffed in an envelope tagged for Santa in "Raindeerland." "The letters were written in this room, and for 100 years, they were just sitting there, waiting," Mattaliano says. After poking around on genealogy web sites, Mattaliano found that Mary and Alfred were the kids of Irish immigrants Patrick and Esther McGann and the letters were written after Patrick died in 1904.

The letters presented a picture of a turn-of-the-century family that likely lived in poverty. Most striking was Mary's slightly singed letter, which read: "Dear Santa Claus ... My little brother would like you to bring him a wagon which I know you cannot afford. I will ask you to bring him whatever you think best. Please bring me something nice what you think best." After her signature, she added, "P.S. Please do not forget the poor."

Wow! Would many kids today be so selfless? Her words, "Don't forget the poor,'"  were touching. Monttaliano and his brother asked each other, "What did she think poor was?"  In today's world "poor" seems to often be the kid with only one I pad. The find is a reminder to not only be less selfish, but to go back into the past and see what lessons can be taught for us today.

The brothers found that Alfred had died in 1965, Mary in 1979, both in Queens, New York. The letters, which Mattaliano calls his "most treasured possessions," are now framed on his fireplace mantel, as are the doll and tiny wagon he added this year. "I wanted them to have a Christmas present, even if it was 100 years too late," Now that's a story that makes my Christmas a lot more meaningful this year.

Are Pancakes Free?

One of my favorite breakfast meals is the noble American pancake. That's the thick flour based pancake, not the egg based crepe which I detest. But when I dine in a restaurant for breakfast I always follow the common sense rules and pay for my pancakes with a smile. Too bad one Natasha West from Chicago doesn't do the same. Even though she is 27 years old, Natasha seems to not understand that pancakes are not free, even at one of those "all you can eat" breakfast places.

It seems that Natasha likes to share her pancakes with an entire table of other non paying cheapskates. Natasha flipped out at a Denny's restaurant after the waitress told her what any child or person with the least bit of ethical standards should know, that she could not share pancakes with an entire table of freeloaders. It was a$4 all you can eat, and cheap food attracts the refuse of the world more often than regular cost meals. After Natasha loaded several plates with stack of pancakes and was confronted by her waitress she became "irate" and started swearing and swinging her fists at the waitress.

None of the blows landed on the waitress, but it gave cover fro pancake thief Nastaha and her freeloaders to run out of the restaurant without paying, only to stop to kick the restaurant door several times (powerful nutrition in those pancakes, I guess) in an effort to show the restaurant that pancakes should be free. The restaurant manager called police, who tracked down West and her dinner crew in a car a short time later. They were taken back to the Denny's where restaurant employees positively identified them. One of West's friends paid for the food and, the good news is that Nasty Natasha was arrested and charged with assault. 

I mention this incident because it is becoming more and more common today. When people are given too much and too little is expected of the they turn into the Natasha's of the world. Let's hope the judge gives Natasha some jail time to learn about  right and wrong, and perhaps serve her nothing but pancakes while she is in the slammer.

Ugly Pet Christmas Sweaters

Anthropologists say that when a civilization becomes wealthy enough, it produces a great number of people who throw their money at the oddest of enterprises. Given the latest Christmas season frenzy over "ugly Christmas sweater parties....for dogs, I suspect we are about at that point. Yep! dogs are now being dressed in outrageous Christmas sweaters and competing to see which has the ugliest of doggies sweaters.

That's right. The news is that Ugly sweaters aren't just a Christmas tradition for people. Cats, dogs and even guinea pigs are joining the party. Don't ask me why, but I think it has something to do with the pet owners eccentricity. An ugly Christmas sweater party for the human is just a gathering at which everyone tries to wear the most over the top Christmas related sweater. Loud color, design, clever messages scrolled across the sweaters and attached objects are usually associated with the best of those.

I remember my daughter once asking me in late November (they sell out by mid December, an indication of their popularity) to go with her to a Goodwill or other thrift store to buy a donated ugly Christmas sweater. She had little trouble finding one (and it cost only a few dollars) that I though was already amazingly garish. Yet, she added her own touches to it and worse it to school several times, and the the Ugly Christmas party she was invited. I think she still has that sweater today.

But to the dog/cat version....PetSmart, the largest pet store chain in the United States, has  ugly sweaters for dogs and cats, and they are among the top five best selling holiday apparel items each Christmas season. The store even has ugly sweaters for guinea pigs. Again, don't ask me why. TV is what popularized the ugly Christmas sweater craze, beginning in the 1980s. But in recent years it has enjoyed a revival, starting with adults, who had parties just to celebrate the ugliness. Kids got in on the act and now pets have nosed their way in, giving owners laughs and plenty to photograph. I guess you have probably seen a cat or dog pictured in one somewhere on the internet.

Ugly sweater dog events across the country this month included an ugly sweater contest for dogs at a park in Anaheim, California; a dog friendly ugly sweater 5K run and walk in National Harbor, Maryland; and separate ugly sweater parties for big and little dogs hosted by Chicago Party Animals, one of the nation's largest canine clubs with 2,000 members. I wonder how the pets feel dressed in those sweaters? Maybe they should bite a few of their owners for forgetting that pets aren't human and see no amusement in the practice.

An ugly sweater has to celebrate Christmas. The bolder the colors, the brighter and the more stuff on it, the better  bring on the bows, snowmen, Santa's, trees, buttons, stars, sequins, rickrack, felt, glitter and cotton. Sleeves can be mismatched, misshapen or missing. But most pets would probably like to move around au naturel instead. the sweaters.  Enough of my comments about this.

Now for an expert's view. "Dog vision is different than human vision and because patterns are not particularly useful to their vision, dogs probably could care less what their sweater looks like," said Dr. Bonnie Beaver, executive director of the American College of Veterinary Behaviorists and a professor at Texas A&M University's College of Veterinary Medicine. Most dogs and cats don't like wearing sweaters unless they got used to being dressed young. "Sometimes the putting on or taking off can cause static electricity, which would make the dog even more anxious the next time," Beaver said. If a dog has grown up wearing clothes or if a dog is small and short haired and it is cold, a sweater will be OK, but wearing one for a contest "is of no consequence to the dog, which will be focused on the scents around it and not on the real appearance of other dogs," Beaver said.

Well, the children of Ugly Dog Sweater dogs are probably glad that instead of themselves, Fido is the one to wear that sweater with Santa wrestling Rudolph the Red Nosed reindeer.

Observing At The Mall

I went, I saw, I suffered, but I survived....the mall that is. Should I say some novenas as a thankful offering? Anyway, as one who hates shopping malls and avoids them as much as possible, I do recognize that when entered and executed surgically they can be useful. The reason for my mall sojourn today was to buy gift certificates to send for the holidays. I succeeded according to plan with nary an injury, I think. Well, it was traumatic. But then I already am a little psychologically bruised from the vicissitudes of everyday life. I know. You already see that from my frequent odd remarks here.

I do have some observations about today's mall adventure. First, there are a whole lot of kids roaming the mall during school time. I wonder if the truancy people are aware. Those kids are mostly middle school aged, so I suspect they are merely taking an "unregistered" day off from school.  Few were accompanied by adults. Those kids tend to ride or hold on to skate boards (none were carrying books or reading), to have heads down poking their cell phones (the real world to them) and could be seen in hordes everywhere in the mall food court. I suspect the mall is their favorite social meeting place, and that few actually bought any of the goods that were being offered for sale.

The next group I noticed were the little ones, children not yet of school age. The parent to each was usually sitting or pushing a stroller, in the case of the under two year old set. Since many of the kiddies were playing in an area with kid play sets and jungle gyms, I suspect the parents were also not at the mall to shop. In particular, the moms there had expressions of faces that screamed, "Thank God! I am out of the house and my little hellion can scream and run all he wants".  It's sad, but for mom and dad the mall was a sanctuary from the insanity of staying home all day and night with a toddler.

Another large group were the oldies, people of retirement age. Many were walking back and forth through the mall also with no intention of shopping. The mall seems to be a safe and comfortable place for the oldster to exercise in order to delay the inevitable heart attack. But it was puzzling to see the oldies gorging on every sort of unhealthy food sold in the food court. Would this not tend to nullify the effects of the walking? Like the above two groups, the oldies bought little while at the mall. With all those non shoppers, I wondered how the mall sells enough to sustain itself.

But then I found the answer in the final group...the Shoppers. Shoppers come in all shapes, ages and sizes but more often tend to be female and between the ages of 25 and 60. They are the ones with a determined look on the face, a willingness to fight, no, to kill for that last pair of pajamas Uncle Harry will receive as his Christmas gift. The Shopper spends a lot of money (because the spouse is never with the Shopper when he or she spends), so a spendthrift like President Obama would be pleased to see the reckless Shopper tossing about of credit cards as fast as he gives away taxpayer money to special interest groups that vote for him. I suspect that less than half the inhabitants of the prison we call the mall actually bought good or services there. It's somewhat like the American taxpayer. One half the population pays all the taxes so the other half can freeload for benefits.

Malls really do reflect real life. Sigh, that's probably why I so hate them.

Will The Real Santa Please Stand Up

I'm a little confused theses days. You see, I thought that fat guy in the red suit (no, not me in my red pajamas, the other fat guy in red) we call Santa Claus was the one and only Christmas good guy.  But now I don't know whether to call the good Christmas gift giver Santa or Yuleman or Tomte or Belsnickel or Pere Noel or La Bafana or Krampas or Ded Moroz or Black Peter. Maybe I should just forget the Santa thing. After all, I already am skeptical of just about everything else.  This is confusing. It seems that in many countries there is an alter ego for Santa.
So, The tradition of children receiving gifts during the month of December is relatively the same no matter where you go in the world, but the character that brings the gifts can vary quite a bit from country to country. Of course, American culture is spread everywhere by Hollywood and the other infantile American cultural contaminants. Perhaps Santa will one day kill off all those other pretenders.

Consider this an education is alter Santa's because I will now relate a few things about those pretenders that I mentioned above. Don't you exit now or I will tell all of those Santa's  about your absence and you'll be in Christmas hell.  Let's start with the Yuleman guy. He is the Santa of Iceland..... or one of the The Yule lads Yulemen) They are a group of thirteen mischievous creatures that have largely taken the place of Santa and, frankly, are a little weird. Each of the thirteen Yulemen is known for playing a different, often weird, trick. Ketkrokur, for example, uses a long hook to steal meat, while Gluggagaegir spies into people's windows in order to find things to steal in the night. Stekkjastaur, a personal favorite, is said to walk on peg legs and harass sheep. Forget leaving cookies and milk for them Christmas Eve. Better to hide under the bed covers.

The Tomte are Scandinavia's version of Santa. Originally they were small, gnomish characters that kept watch over family farms. They were generally kind and looked out for people, but they had short fuses like Sam Kinneson. So they were quick to beat up or play tricks on those who weren't good stewards of the farmland.  Today, the American Santa has turned them into fat little men who both resemble Santa in appearance and bring Christmas gifts to kids.
Belsnickel is a legendary figure who accompanies Santa Claus in certain regions of Europe, particularly in Holland.

Like Santa he is a gift giver, but only by threat. He’s usually depicted as a mountain man-style figure with fur covering his body, and he occasionally wears a mask with a long tongue.  Belsnickel is generally a character to be feared, and in most regions he is employed as a sort of warning to coerce the brats....I mean the children, to behave. I think the Belsnickel is a paranoid kind of guy, something like a character Jack Nicholson plays in those odd movies he seems to make Pere Noel is the French Santa, so you know he has to be both pretentious and anti social.

Instead of using reindeer he rides a single donkey called Gui. I wonder if he is the French exception, you know someone in that country who actually bathes once in a while. The French also have a character called La Pere Fouettard (The Whipping Father). Like Belsnickel, he's a figure who is supposed to be feared by naughty kids, and based on his story, it's easy to see why. In the most popular version of it, it is said that in the 1100s La Pere Fouettard and his wife kidnapped and murdered three young men and then cooked them into a stew. I think even Santa will stay clear of that guy.

Befana is a witch-like character who has become a big part of yuletide celebrations in Italy. Yep! The Italians have a female Santa. But wait! It's not because they are progressive. Befana is portrayed as an old hag who rides a broomstick, and she typically wears a black shawl and carries a bag of gifts. She supposedly does not like to be seen, and is said to whack any child who her spies on her with her broomstick. That's pretty consistent of the Italian male view of women.

In the Bavarian part of Germany is Krampus, who has nothing in common with Santa. He is a monster, but then, didn't most of the Nazis also emerge from Bavaria too? People in Bavaria dress up as the Krampus and parade through the city streets scaring other people (No word yet on whether Krampus goose steps). There are some towns that hold festivals devoted to jokingly celebrating the history of the creature. Those Germans even have a jaded view of Christmas and Santa.

Ded Moroz is the traditional holiday gift giver of Russia and other  Slavic countries in Eastern Europe. Like Santa, Ded Moroz wears a red costume and sports a white beard, but he doesn't use reindeer or ride a sleigh. Instead, he drives a troika, which is a traditional Russian horse drawn sled. As the story goes, he was once an evil and vicious sorcerer who would kidnap children and demand presents as a ransom. Over time, he was reformed, and now he gives gifts to children in order to atone for his once wicked ways. Hmmmm, sort of like the politician caught having an affair with his 18 year old office intern.

In Holland, the Santa there (Sinterklaas) has not an elf, but Black Peter, a little boy who helps him hand out presents. There are many versions of how Black Peter came to work with Sinterklaas, some of them quite controversial. If Sinterklaas was the American Santa I think the left wing nuts here would probably accuse him of making Black Peter his sex slave. To avoid that embarrassing notion the Dutch have sanitized Black Peter's reputation and now often described as being a chimney sweep.

There you have it. Take your pick or simply ignore all those Santa types and put up a Ḥanukah Bush instead of a Christmas tree this year.

Christmas Stockings

While in my attic pulling out my Christmas decorations I cam across Jane's old Christmas stocking. You no doubt know the stocking routine at Christmas. The hanging of stockings by the fireplace mantle is a familiar Christmas custom here and in Europe. People with homes lacking fireplaces hang Christmas stockings from bedposts, doorknobs, windowsills, staircases and other areas. When Santa Claus arrives on Christmas Eve, he fills the stockings with small treats and gifts.

But where did that tradition start?  I have no answer except to refer you to a number of stocking traditions that claim the whole idea started there. The one I like most is that Saint Nicholas (that same guy on which much of modern Christmas is patterned) in the 3rd century put a bag of gold in a stocking and hung it on the fireplace mantle of a proud peasant, who Nicholas wanted to help without making an issue of it. And now every parent is a Saint Nicholas to his or her kids watch Christmas.

Even I got a stocking filled with "stuff'"as a kid. Santa must have told my parents to forgive me for all the mischievous behaviors that I displayed during the year. In those days the stockings were filled with little goodies- candy, small toys, socks (Horrors!), little puzzles etc. But over the years since, some Christmas stockings have some big items included.  For example, some people give their teenager kids or her first car by depositing its keys into the stocking. You may place any key of any car you have in mine if you wish.

Point is, the Christmas stocking is making a comeback. When as my mom knitted our stockings when I was a kid, now Macy's and other such places sell $75 elaborately embroidered Christmas stockings that can one-up the nosy neighbor who drops by  your house during the season.

In some countries, the contents of the Christmas stocking are the only gifts that a child receives at Christmas from Santa Claus, so they are a big deal. Unfortunately, Western Christmas tradition also says that a child who behaves badly during the year will not get a gift in their Christmas stocking and will receive a piece of coal instead. I suspect many politicians and reality TV stars get a lot of coal each Christmas.

Since my daughter is grown and gone from the households and I live alone I have no stockings at my home to fill anymore. The good news is that with no stockings hanging on my mantle there is a good possibility that I will finally escape the coal in a stocking routine than seems to fit me all to well.

May all your stockings be without holes and filled with gold this Christmas.

No Such Thing As Christmas

It used to be that some anti Christmas people didn't believe in Santa Claus. But a few years ago the politically correct advocates came into power and broadened the debate. Now, every December, there is a flock of non believers who say that Christmas itself doesn't exist. They prefer a new holiday carved from Christmas called "The Winter Holiday" as in "Happy Holidays", not "Merry Christmas". For them, Christmas is dead because Christ is dead, or a something like that. And they become very upset if any public institution celebrates Christmas.

The annual attempt by the Christmas nullifiers is happening everywhere in the United States. They insist that "Christmas" is not "inclusive enough", that because many people are not Christians the Christians have no right to have their own holiday. Bah Humbug! We hate it when anyone acknowledges Christmas, they mumble. Further they declare, if a government mentions the word Christmas or any religious variation that said government is abusing non Christians. That's why they deny Christmas and try to change the Christmas holiday into their own "inclusive" version. Don't they realize that the existence of the Christmas narrative is why there is any holiday at all on December 25th? It's silly, mean spirited and idiotic. But then, so are many politically correct types who want to create an imaginary world of their own liking. To follow their lead would be like banning the word "Mohammed' because using it is "not inclusive" to non Muslims.

So the latest PC police against Christmas is in Roselle Park, New Jersey. A New Jersey city council's decision to add the word "Christmas" to the name of its tree lighting ceremony prompted one council member to step down because it "turned it from a non religious event to a religious one," she said. Charlene Storey announced her decision just minutes after the Roselle Park council approved the change. Good riddance to her, I say. Charlene is a former Catholic, a self described as an atheist.  So Charlene resigned the other day saying that the town's decision to change the ceremony's name from "A Tree Lighting" to "A Christmas Tree Lighting" favors one religion and "cuts non Christians out of the loop."

Of course Christmas cuts them out of the loop. It's a celebration that was Christian in origin, though now seems to be as much secular and as popular among non Christians as with Christians. Roselle Park Mayor Carl Hokanson replied to Charlene's resignation with a dose of common sense, something most of the politically correct lack in great abundance. "It's not a street, it's not a building, it's a Christmas tree," Hokanson said.

I wonder if Charlene will forfeit her Christmas bonus.  Or if she refuses to observe the holiday recognized by the federal government we know as Christmas Day, and goes in to work that day. I suspect there is little chance of that. Charlene likes the perks of Christmas, but doesn't want it called what it is because the non perks "offend" her. I hope Santa puts plenty of Christmas coal in her "Holiday" stocking this year.

The irony of these idiotic protests against calling a holiday by its rightful name is that Christmas is not really about Jesus for most people. It's more about consumerism and black Friday sales and discounts and buying more stuff than they can fit in their attics and closets. It's about getting drunk at the Christmas party and kissing that sexy secretary so lusted over all year by so many or her co workers, it's about silly Christmas lights and decorations we all love to see and erect, about those Christmas movies, about people being nicer to each other (except Scroogess Charlene), about lovely Christmas movies and ugly Christmas sweaters, about all those Christmas  sweets grandma bakes and most of all it is about humans being more tolerant and loving toward each other. The latter is the part most missing from Charlene's politically correct brain. Merry Christmas, Charlene!

White Elephant Christmas party

Have you ever been to a White Elephant Party? It's a Christmas thing, so anyone who lives where Christmas traditions rule knows about White Elephants (the party, not what you see on New Year's Eve after your 8th scotch and water!) So the White Elephant gift exchange is a popular Christmas event where people vie to walk away with the best present. Uh, make that the funniest one. The more outrageous the gift the better. In most of those parties, often held at work or where people know each other well, but don't celebrate Christmas together, everyone brings his or her gift.

The gifts are put in a pile, and eventually people gather, draw numbered and pick based on the number held. That means you don't get to give the guy you hate an ugly Christmas sweater. It's instead, random foolishness. The good news is that swapping is allowed. So, for instance, if you are French guy and you get a Rosey O'Donnell bar of soap, something no Frenchman ever uses, you can swap that for something someone else hates equally.

That's the general idea, though there are many variations and even many other names for the White Elephant gift exchange. Many include heavy does of alcohol. Funny gifts make the biggest splash at the party, and weird artwork, clothing and gadgets are also big. Once I saw someone give a sandals with white sox slipper gift, but the person drawing the gift was a girl and she quickly gave it to the biggest nerd in the group (also of French heritage, since the French frequently can be seen wearing white sox and sandals). The nerd loved it! But then I like ugly Christmas t shirts and sweaters. Give me  some respect for wearing those in public. (but I never wear that when there's a Hell's Angel nearby).

Do you have the idea of this White Elephant party? You may one day get invited or be summoned and must go. Just in case, here are some actual White Elephant gifts you can take with you. I know they will be DEpreciated.... The toilet bowl coffee mug, the People of Wal mart desk calendar, pick your nose cups, the high heel tape dispenser, a bacon candy bar, a butt/face soap bar (the white is for your face, the dark side is for your butt), the Fanny Bank farting coin drop, an electronic yodeling pickle, Dashboard Jesus....I think I am getting sacrilegious. If you get invited to a White Elephant just be yourself. You'll fit right in.....

Almost Giving Thanks

It's the holiday season and that means we should reflect and evaluate our past year, give thanks for the good things in our lives. But wait! There's no fun in being that positive. Let Buddha reflect, not I. I am better at venting about things that I am not thankful for.  Hmmm Maybe I should meet the reflecting types half way and combine my no thanks with thanks. I'll try that....sort of.

One thing I give thanks for is that there were no new Kardashians to hit the airwaves. But then, Bruce Jenner changed sex and promoting him/herself all over the media this past year. That sort of kills the Kardashian elation I have. However, the Caitlin Jenner nonsense will surely flame out in the coming year. It's hard to spin  much positive from that confused Jenner guy/girl. I think he/she may become more pathetic than politically correct in 2106.

Thanks number two is that President Obama has become so annoyingly incompetent and partisan that he is no irrelevant to Americans and every world leader. They all have no respect for Obama, but then who could? We have to endure just one more year with the worst President in modern times. Uh, now the bad news. It appears that that pathological liar, that incompetent fool, the lady who envisions herself a Queen, one Hillary Clinton will take Obama's place on the presidential stage in 2016. The voters in the U.S. , being a largely uninformed, politically correct lot will no doubt show up and elect her as the new Obama.  I suspect after the first year of President Hillary even I may re write history and praise Obama.

Thank you number three is a hope more than a fact. I am hopeful that in 2016 some of the many phony politically correct issues ands groups will wear themselves thin and disappear (no doubt to be replaced by even more onerous ones). I am saying novenas, for example, that the racist 'Black Lives Matter' movement will stop hating Asian, Hispanics and Whites and look in the mirror for explanation why that minority group lives so much in despair, havoc violence and economic distress. One must clean one's own house before complaining about a ugly front porch of someone else's house.

I also give thanks that many more here are now seeing the 'War Against Women', 'Income Inequality', and endless other phony causes are losing traction (it takes time for some people to think and discover truth). I have a glimmer of hope that instead of a year of perception is reality, we will have just plain old reality. I also want the English language to return to the precision it used to have before the politically correct crazies changed it to fit their artificial agenda. Even the trendiest PC causes get stale. Many of 2015's already smell like fish.

So those are a few of my almost thanks.  But whether I am right or wrong about 2015, I am sure there will be a new set of irritants in 2016 to rant about. I know, you give your own "no thanks" to that!